Yes – it was a bloody good wedding…

Well that was some weekend!

Can’t believe a week has gone by already.

Were you there?


Why not?

O.k., living on a different continent is not a valid reason I’m afraid.

No it’s not!

Kate’s daughter and family were here from Texas.

Yeah. That’s made your ‘sorry I was on a field trip in Antarctica,‘ excuse look a bit feeble, hasn’t it?

Never mind though, I’m in a good mood so I’ll tell you all about it. Get yourselves comfy. Settle down at the back there. Here we go.

IMG_0472We had a bit of a family get together on the Friday night, whilst we were setting up the tables and stuff in the big tent (sorry, Kate. I keep forgetting to say marquee)

It was great to catch up.

Then on Saturday morning the condemned man ate a hearty breakfast in the local Premier Inn (yes, I had been banished from home – not allowed to see the bride apparently!) with my uncle, cuz, Mrs cuz and 4 year old mini cuz Fraser.

Back up to room to get changed.

Forgot the hair brush, so off up to Mrs cuz to borrow hers for a quick flick through my thinning pate.

Yes you’re right, it was a good job they stayed there too!

Little bro in his best man suit picked me up in the merc he’d nicked for the day and presented me with  my very own pair of £2 sunglasses. Nothing like a mob wedding, huh! Shame the bow unraveled on the front of the car, but hey, you can’t have everything. It was a nice knot! That’s my big little brother in front of the car trying to hide the entanglement!13938404_340645452989890_6559908707990097971_n

Then we dashed over to Himley Hall.


Yes you’re right, that was the place where Edward and Mrs Simpson used to go for a spot of ‘rumpy pumpy,‘ as you so eloquently put it.

Kate turned up a bit later. Here she is with her son, also a Steve.


Yes, she did look stunning. I’ll tell her that you complimented her.

I said yes.

She said, ‘if I must.

The registrar looked pleased as we signed on the dotted line.

They played ‘Don’t Stop Believing‘,’ by Journey and we all walked out for some piccies in the grounds.

Back in Kate’s posh motor to the big tent.


Bit of nosh.

Lot of wine.

Little bro did a speech and nearly cracked at the end. Love you too, Steve.

I did a speech as well. I won’t bore you with it here.

Had a bit of a break.

Took Fraser to see Billy Whizz (see my blog ‘From Billy Joel to Billy Whizz,‘ if that reference has passed you by – you’ll like it, he’s cute!)

Back to the tent in the evening.

Bart put on a disco – thanks mate.

Me and Kate had a quick wobble round.

No, she  wouldn’t let me hold her bottom!

Gunnrunner turned up and put on an excellent live slot. Scared most of the non rockers off.

I even got on stage with them. Yeah, that’s me in the white.IMG_0350

What do you mean, you heard the guitar wasn’t plugged in! I keep telling everyone it was wireless!

Packed up after midnight and we all went home.


Did we what!?

How rude! Anyway  I’m afraid is for me and Kate to know! 😜

Yes. It was a bloody good wedding!


Should I practise my speech?

Have you seen it?
I know.
How about that then, eh?
Little old me up for, ‘The People’s Book Prize.
What do you mean, ‘What for?
For ‘DOGNAPPED!’ of course!Cover with Title
Honestly, sometimes I think I have to explain things rather too much and…

Well what else would it be for!?
It is the only book I’ve written after all.
Yes, I know there’s ‘IN THE DOGHOUSE!’ too, but that’s not out yet, is it!
No it’s not.
Not until November.
We spoke about this – remember?
So. ‘DOGNAPPED!’ Up for an award.
Misty’s chuffed.
So am I to be honest.
To bits!
Well, see – there are eight finalists all together.
For the summer 2016 prize.
So there’s a one in eight chance of winning.
Well rather more than that actually – because you’ll vote for it won’t you?
Of course you will.
You’ve read it after all.
Yes you did, I saw you.
And heard you giggling.
There’s no shame in that.
Yes, I know it’s for kids but you know what? Mums and Dads like it too.
No, I know they won’t admit it either, but they do.
So what do you think, should I practice my speech?
For if I win of course! Pay attention please!
No you’re right. I’m getting ahead of myself.
A bit too optimistic.
Heading for a fall? Come on, there’s no need to get quite so melodramatic, surely.
Pardon? No, I don’t know. Hang on I’ll Google it.
Peoples Book Prize prize?
Yes, I know I stick my tongue out when I’m typing.
It is a bad habit, I agree.
No, I don’t think I should have ‘some sort of therapy,‘ as you put it.
Look, do you want to know what the bloody prize is or not!
Hang on, I just need to click…
See how much more difficult it is with my mouth closed?
Here we go. Oh! Fame and fortune, just as I thought.
So you will vote, won’t you.
Go on, I’ll split I with you.
You can have the fame…
What! You want the fortune?
Well I was rather looking forward to that myself!
Oh, have it your way!
Here’s the link.

Don’t forget to vote will you? Before the end of August!
Pretty, pretty please!

Misty will love you forever, see –

Now you can’t beat that, can you!?