Jogle Blogle – ‘Blogle HQ control, we have a problem.’

At 9:32a.m. on Saturday 29th June 2019 the following distress signal was received at Blogle H.Q.

Blogle HQ control we have a problem STOP Jogler sub-support system experiencing chronic fatigue STOP Catastrophic repeat CATASTROPHIC failure imminent STOP Emergency re-supply requested OUT

Our hearts were heavy and our eyes were moist as, not for the first time on this mission, we prepared ourselves for the worst. Would Steve’s walk from John O’Groats to Land’s End have to be abandoned?

Immediately we back at Blogle HQ began poring over the technical manuals to identify a) the problem, and b) the answer.

Also it was imperative to locate the position of the Mini-Jogler to establish as to whether a successful re-supply mission could be attempted, if and when a feasible solution was found.

Fortunately the problem was found to be immediately apparent. Not only that but the cause was quickly identified.

From in depth analysis it was determined that the Joglers sub-support system was indeed compromised and that any, all, or a combination of the following conditions had led to this vital component of the Jogle becoming at risk of sudden collapse:-

1/ The Jogler had eaten far too much custard and cake on his journey, causing him to gain weight as opposed to losing it.


2/ The Jogler had consumed too much ale, with the same consequence as (1) above.

3/ The Jogler had consumed too much custard AND too much ale, leading to failure as described in (1) above. High level discussions determined that this combined with (4) & (5) below were by far the most likely scenario.

4/ The unfortunate decision to include the 3 peaks on the Joglers charity walk from John O’Groats to Land’s End had led to a serious miscalculation regarding the durability and life expectancy of the Joglers sub-support system.

5/ The Joglers ridiculous decision (as highlighted by the Blogler on many occasions) to climb each peak and then return in the same direction, rather than carrying on over the top and down the other side, had increased the mileage to be covered by such an extent that the Joglers sub-support system was simply doomed to failure. Perhaps at this point I should simply say, I told you so! And who has to sort it out for him? Exactly, little old moi!

The answer was blindingly obvious. The Jogler needed new footwear – immediately!

Fortunately within minutes the Mini-Jogler (by now back at Jogle base camp, here in the Black Country) had also responded to the distress call and had contacted an ancient but noble sect of shoe makers to commission another pair. And that load of old cobblers would not let us down. Immediately they began crafting footwear of the finest quality products from this region. The uppers were made from the finest cut glass lead crystal (toughened of course) proving once and for all that the glass slippers of Cinderella were no myth. Laces were wrought from the very same iron which created the chains which held the Titanic anchor. The tongues were each lovingly carved from a single scratching upon the virtuous thigh of a Black Country maiden from a mould previously made of the Jogler’s foot. The soles were forged from nails to prove that a proper mon from these parts can walk on anything. The left hand side was inscribed with the letter ‘L’ to ensure that the Jogler did not become confused whilst the Jogler sub-support system was being installed. And of course there was the corresponding ‘R’ sole.

The difficulty now became exactly how to carry out the re-supply mission. Communication with the Jogler was sparse to say the least, but he was believed to be somewhere in Mid-Walles, accompanied by the Jogleress.

It quickly became apparent that the Mini-Jogler was in no fit state to carry out the mission as he had yet to recover from his exertions in climbing Snowdon a few days previously.

Contact had been lost with the Jogleressette, who was missing, presumed abducted by aliens (or dragged off by the Baggies at the very least).

If you recall, in the previous emergency, when the Jogler had to be topped up with wi-fi, see

the ‘Crippled Duck’ had been deployed. Contact was made with the Blogler’s Mate, but unfortunately due to extreme wi-if exposure that proud craft had had to be buried beneath a lake of grey peas ‘n bacon. We salute you noble vessel and thank you for your gallant efforts!

It was decided that a stealth mission should be launched. It is well known that the Wellsh llanguage is so dangerous that the ‘Ll’s’ and ‘Ff’s’have to travel around in pairs to avoid being mugged by random lone ‘Y’s’ which are reported to be very vicious.

To that end, the Bllogller’s Lland Rover is being readied, a bllack Ffreellander modell, to hopeffulllly avoid detection. 

As the Jogller and Joglleress’s  position is not preciselly known, the Bllogllers hounds, Bllue and Milllly, are being readied to ffollllow the scent.

Allso, in anticipation of the Blloger becoming incapacitated by llack off ffood, the Bllogllers Wiffe is also being prepared ffor the mission.

Updates willll (sorry- I’llll just switch scramblle code mode to offff) There’s better, isn’t it, look you! As I was saying, updates will follow but they may seriously compromise and delay future Blogle transmissions. Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible. Lush!

FOOTNOTE: (Footnote! Dear oh dear, I have to smile myself sometimes!)



As witnessed by the Jogler himself whilst in darkest Scotland when he was passed by the 4:20 Virgin to Inverness, part of the account above has been found to be erroneous. Due to a distinct scarcity of Black Country maidens, the tongues of his shoes have had to be made from man made polymers and therefore the longevity of this replacement pair cannot be guaranteed!




If you cracked so much as a smile during this Emergency Blogle, then feel free to contribute to Steve’s just giving page for Macmillan Cancer Support at

After all, you’d pay good money for this if David Walliams had written it!

If you failed to even titter, then this post was written by, David Walliams.


Jogle Blogle – Day 41

Jogle Blogle – Day 41

Having spent a thankfully uneventful rest day in Beddgelert our Jogler awoke refreshed and ready to continue his walk from John O’Groats to Land’s End on Day 41 of his journey – and guess what, the Sun shone! If only someone had joined him we could have had a picture of the Jogler’s sponsored tee shirt in all its glory. But no, Steve was alone on his meander through the lanes and villages of the Welsh countryside. 


After visiting the grave of Gelert (fake news) and the local railway station he sauntered down past Maentwrog parish church.






Wildlife of the day was this – I don’t know – grass snake? I know you lot will put me right if I’m mistaken.








The man made lake at Trawsfynydd is home to the only U.K. inland nuclear power station for which it supplied the cooling water. The plant was shut down in 1991 but won’t be fully decommissioned until 2080. You have to wonder if it was worth it really don’t you? It only produced electricity for only 26 years and then will take the best part of a century to make the place marginally less toxic.




A statue to commemorate – Hedd Wyn who was made the winning bard at Birkenhead Eisteddfod in August 1917, posthumously- less than a month after his death in Flanders during World War I.









And so the Jogler having sauntered to his destination at Coed-Y-Brenin (wherever that is) retired to his feast of hula hoops and Welsh cakes. We’ll leave you with some scenic pictures of his trip.






Stats of the day were,

Mileage: 19.3      Total: 736.43

Steps: 38,484      Total: 1,498,922

Time taken: 7 hours 11 minutes and 23 seconds

Steve has some gruelling mileages coming up before his next rest day back in England on Day 50. If you’d like to support his charity walk for Macmillan Cancer Support, his just giving page link is


Jogle Blogle – Day 39 & Day 40

Jogle Blogle – Day 39 & Day 40

Day 39 dawned wet and rainy again as the Jogler and Jogleress prepared to tackle the third mountain on this, my brother Steve’s walk from John O’Groats to Land’s End and 3 peaks challenge.








But hold on, what’s this? The Mini-Jogler has turned up for moral support and bought with him a seemingly random bunch of blokes. There’s Ian, Matt A, Matt W, Mark, Rob and last but not least – last seen working in a chip shop – Aaron. Incidentally – see if you can guess which one has the selfie stick? That’s right – Bruce Willis.

Now as you know dear reader I have not shirked in my dedication to the Blogle but if you think that I’m going to write, the Jogler, the Jogleress, the Mini-Jogler, Ian, Matt A, Matt W, Mark, Rob and Aaron from the chip shop, every five minutes – just to get the word count up, then you’re very much mistaken. In light of the fact that my brother still hasn’t heeded my advice that when he reaches the peak of a mountain he should carry on in the same direction but instead turns around and comes down the way he went up, I have a plan. We’ll call Ian, Matt A, Matt W, Mark, Rob and that well known Elvis impersonator Aaron, collectively – Two Direction.


IMG_3471So they set off in the direction of Snowdon with Two Direction in tow. The weather brightened. Hooray! Then it got worse again. Boo! Which meant that at the summit, as has been the case on all of the peaks, there wasn’t much of a view. So we only have the obligatory shirt waving selfie. The occasion was marked, fittingly by Mark, with a celebratory bottle of Bathams.




And so to the descent where they encountered wildlife of the day – a mountain sheep.







And then – I’m afraid that then the inevitable happened. After one final selfie in slightly better weather, Two Direction split! Yes, Aaron (after a successful solo career) and Rob probably dissatisfied with the direction that Two Direction we’re going decided that they would be better off as a duo and legged it. Isn’t it always the way?


Ian, Matt A, Matt W and Mark decided to keep the group name as they posed for one last photo at the start of the Rhyd Ddu path (although it was their end) as a reminder of their day of glory before they too melted away into obscurity – well, after a quick pint anyway.


The Jogleress and Mini-Jogler bade Steve a hearty farewell, leaving him to Jogle alone back along the valley to Beddgelert, as the skies brightened, and to his digs for the night, looking forward to a well earned rest on Day 40.

Well done bro – it’s all downhill from here. 

If you’d like to find out Steve’s reasons for doing this and perhaps donate to his chosen charity, Macmillan Cancer Support, then visit his just giving page at

Stats of the day were:-

Mileage: 14.4   Total: 717.13

Steps: 35,334   Total: 1,460,438

Time taken: 8 hours 7 minutes and 8 seconds – but I’m guessing that some of that was in the pub! 


Footnote: Once she got back to civilisation, the Jogleress posted a picture of the group at the summit of Snowdon on Facebook (other social media platforms are available). Facebook’s facial recognition program tagged me, the Blogler, as being there. When I looked, the little white square thingy indicating that FB thought it was me, was actually around the fizzog* of the Jogler. Now I’m not denying that the Jogler is an exceedingly handsome chap, but this can only mean one of two things. Firstly, that Facebook assumes that I am seven years younger than I actually am or secondly, it thinks that Steve is seven years older – well he did have a hard paper round! 

*The Jogle Blogle accepts no responsibility for any Black Country terms which may accidentally have been used.

Jogle Blogle – Day 38

Jogle Blogle – Day 38

IMG_3395The Jogler and Jogleress stopped for a mirrored selfie as they left Betws-Y-Coed on Day 38 of the Jogle. No rain today for a pleasant change during this walk on the next leg of Steve’s traipse through the countryside from John O’Groats to Land’s End which was along relatively traffic free roads. This was the best picture they could get of Swallow Falls as they were unwilling to pay the £2.50 entrance fee. Entrance fee!? When did that happen. And who owns nature anyway! 

By the way – just a reminder that it is also Day 38 of the Blogle on this, National Writing Day @writeday


They nearly passed the Ugly House – a renovated tearoom come conservation, boulder built cottage owned by the Snowdonia Society – but they took a side road instead which led them past this stagecoach, a local landmark in Capel Curig belonging to the Tyn-Y-Coed Inn. The original coach was purchased by a former owner from the film company which produced Hitchcock’s, Jamaica Inn. In the 1980’s it was exchanged for the current Yorkshire Stagecoach which was then completely refurbished and painted in the livery of the Royal Mail. Why a stagecoach? The Inn stands on the A5 which was built by Thomas Telford to take, among other things,  Irish M.P.’s in style from Holyhead to London.


They stopped at The Caffi for a cream tea at elevenses before making their way past a nice little church and the National Outdoor Centre at Plas Y Brenin.


Wildlife of the day was a Golden Eagle, although it may have been a seagull.



IMG_3420IMG_3425Another selfie, this time blocking out the scenery at Llyn Gwynant before finding out that in this part of the world, cabbages are a protected species. 


Past the copper mine and into Beddgelert. Now I’m not going to regale you with tales which may or not be true of the hound named Gelert which was mistakenly killed after protecting its family, but instead as a purveyor of children’s stories will tell you that the writer and illustrator of the Rupert Bear tales, Alfred Bestall once lived here. Also the area around here has been the setting for many a film, including The Inn of the Sixth Happiness and Tomb Raider 2.



As you can see from the stats below, today’s mileage was relatively modest, but the Jogler has amassed some 200 miles in the last 8 days. Quite impressive for someone of his advancing years. And Snowdon awaits tomorrow, so join us on the Jogle Blogle then. Meanwhile, if you’d like to donate to Steve’s chosen charity Macmillan Cancer Support, the link to his just giving page is

Mileage: 18.1   Total: 702.73

Steps: 36,898    Total: 1,425,104

Time Taken: 6 hours 24 minutes and 38 seconds


Jogle Blogle – Day 37

Jogle Blogle – Day 37


fullsizeoutput_80bDay 37 of our Blogle following the Jogle. The Jogler and Jogleress paused to look down on Denbigh where they had just spent the night and to the ruins of the castle and town walls which were commissioned by Edward I in 1282. That initial phase was completed some 25 years later.



IMG_3377IMG_3385With some great views across the surrounding countryside our intrepid pair came across this signpost helpfully pointing the way to Cornwall. (Incidentally – I think this tells us all we need to know about why the Welsh use so many ‘L’s in their language – they’ve been nicking them off Cornwall!) A great aid you would have thought on Steve’s walk from John O’Groats to Land’s End. But no! The Jogler ignored the directions. Is he mad? Can he not read? Has the Jogleress persuaded him to abandon his quest? Ah – here’s the reason – there’s another mountain to climb. Snowdon, the last of the three peaks on my brother’s charity walk for Macmillan Cancer Support, lies in the far distance as the Jogleress by some magical trickery points out.


fullsizeoutput_80eAfter a dearth of wildlife of the day the Jogler seems to consider that this shot of some cows should suffice and get this, says that there was a Red Kite hovering above them! Yeah Steve, whatever!

At last, they reach the Snowdonia National Park. 


fullsizeoutput_80dAnd an info board about engineering – at last, something the Blogler can relate to – William Hazledine was known as ‘Merlin’ by Thomas Telford because of the wonders he could wrought with iron. His ironworks in Shrewsbury manufactured the beams and columns for the world’s first iron framed factory in 1796 and  he subsequently founded a foundry in Ruabon from where he supplied material for the Pontcycyllte aqueduct. Telford and Hazeldine worked together on some of the most iconic bridges at Menai, Conwy and this one here, the Pont Waterloo Bridge of which the Jogler notably forgot to take a picture. Tsk!

IMG_3392Finally down into Betws-y-coed, their stop for the night.

And the stats are as follows-

Mileage: 22.5      Total: 684.63

Steps: 47,434       Total: 1,388,206

Time taken: 8 hours 16 minutes 57 seconds

And if you’d like to donate to Macmillan Cancer Support, Steve’s just giving link is:



Jogle Blogle – Day 36

Jogle Blogle – Day 36

Before we start out on Day 36, all here at the Jogle Blogle would like to give a massive shout out to Mavis Paterson @MavisCycle who, in her own cycling Lejog, went from Land’s End to John O’Groats in an amazing 23 days for her 960 mile trip. At 81 she secured her place in the Guinness Book of Records as the oldest woman to achieve such a phenomenal feat! Like Steve she will also be donating her proceeds to Macmillan Cancer Support. Well done Mavis – fantastic!

I promised you a more exciting day today didn’t and how’s this for starters – The Jogleress is back! No, I don’t know where she came from either, but I’d know that rucksack anywhere now, wouldn’t you? So leaving the glorious architecture and ancient history of Chester behind  oath the Jogler and his wife set off on another leg of their John O’Groats to Land’s End. The sun shone and at last the Jogler was able to show off his Jogle tee shirt. They passed another reminder of home (well Sue did anyway – she is a Brummie after all, although after 25 years with the Jogler I do reckon that she’s an honorary Black Country wench by now). Chester bade them a cheery goodbye as they went on they’re merry way out past the racecourse and river, finding themselves in Wales, where the Welsh live. Airbus, through Mop where they passed this plaque commemorating the digging up of some ancient Brit in 1831 and how all the stuff they found was nicked by the bloody English and put in the British Museum. Down into the countryside where they came upon Offa’s Dyke in all its glory. Built around 1250 years ago the dyke is an earthwork consisting of a ditch with the spoil from that excavation piled onto the Mercian side and roughly marks out the border between England and Wales. And the king of Mercia during its construction? Some bloke called Offa, obviously. I’ve told you before we’re better than the Open University we are.

The aptly named Castle View B & B in Denbigh was to be their digs for the night in the appropriately named Dudley room.

Steve’s just giving link is

Stats for the day.

Miles: 27.5

Steps: 54581

Time taken: 10 hours 10 minutes and 31 seconds 

Jogle Blogle – Day 35

Jogle Blogle – Day 35

Day 35 of the Jogle (it stands for John O’Groats, Land’s End in case you hadn’t figured it out yet) appears at first glance to be probably the most boring for Steve on his journey south so far, but for us followers I think that I’ve found an interesting little wrinkle that we could all make use of – so bear with me.

IMG_3287IMG_3296Continuing his charity walk for Macmillan Cancer Support, see link here to his just giving page:  Steve set out from his overnight stop at St. Helens (those of you who are old enough just heard Eddie Waring say ‘ Arrr St. ‘elans’ didn’t you – admit it!) and crossed the many arteries of the North West, the Mersey, The M56 up by Runcorn and the Manchester Ship Canal on the outskirts of Frodsham.



And after a long slog along his favoured surface, pavement, he arrived in Chester. Told you it was boring didn’t I? Never mind, I’ve a feeling tomorrow will be better.



IMG_3294Oh – and that little wrinkle I was going to tell you about – no it wasn’t a ruse to get you to read to the end of a boring post, honest! It seems that en route our Jogler stopped at Macky Dee’s in Runcorn and when he told them what he was doing they were so impressed that they gave him some free bottles of water. Similarly at Hope Corner in Runcorn they gave him a slice of Victoria Sponge. So – I figured out that we only have to get ourselves a Jogle tee shirt each and we can wander around all day getting freebies. Sounds like a plan to me, what do you think?

I’ll give you yesterday’s stats first, as I know you missed them:

Mileage: 31.5

Steps: 61749

Time taken 6:48:04 + 3:05:59

And today’s 

Mileage: 28.7                      Giving a total of: 634.63

Steps: 47,353                          Adding up to: 1,286,191

Time taken: 8 hours 55 minutes and 10 seconds.



Jogle Blogle – Day 34

Jogle Blogle – Day 34

Day 34. The Jogler set out from yet another AirBnB hosted by Andrew in Preston and walked a measly 11.2 miles. What!? That can’t be right can it? Is he actually walking from John O’Groats to Land’s End or just having a little wander about. Oh hang on, there’s another message coming through to Blogle HQ. Yes, his bloody route tracer thingy app looks to have broken down again and following that stroll he did a further 20.3 miles. 

Now far be it for me to complain but – stop sniggering over there, I’m a very unflappable person normally and – right, that’s it! You over there who’s gone puce in the face trying not to laugh, get out! And take your mate there with you. Yes that one! The one that’s doubled up laughing. Go on. I can wait…

Have they gone?

Good. Bloody cheek! Now as I was saying, I’m really not one to complain – it’s alright, I can wait for the muffled titters to subside – but this isn’t the first time his bloody route tracer thingy app has decided to split Steve’s journey into two without so much as a ‘by your leave.’ And you know what that means don’t you? Exactly! Here at heart of Blogling operations I have to do sums. As if I have time! Here I am providing serious journalistic commentary on this epic charity event for Macmillan Cancer Support (See link here ) and now I’m expected to do adding up as well! I ask you! It’s a good job that I don’t moan really, isn’t it?

IMG_3254Anyway, the Jogler crossed the River Ribble – Steve knew that because he studied it in ‘O’ level geography. Who says you don’t use what you’re taught in school? There’s a perfect example. O.k., it took nearly forty years, but there it is, the education system in all its glory. I wonder if he passed? As his brother I suppose that that’s the sort of thing I really ought to know.





Or perhaps was it this sign that gave the game away? We may never know. What was verified however was that Leyland did indeed build trucks. Here’s one.IMG_3261


And continuing the trucking theme, here’s a Whale tanker. Why is that important, well because they sponsor Steve on this little adventure. They have their logo on the tee shirt he hasn’t been able to wear until recently because it’s rained so bloody much.


IMG_3258IMG_3262IMG_3264More trucks as he crossed the M6. Where are we now Steve? Oh – Charnock Richard is it? Ah yes, there’s a view that I’m more familiar with.




Another one of those interminable ‘ice’ warning signs. Surprisingly little sign of the slippery stuff though, the Jogler reports.





He is however quite a fan now of pavements. Having done without through much of Scotland they appear now to be one of life’s little luxuries that the mid-point of his journey Jogler really appreciates.





So the stats: Let’s see. Add that to that, carry the one. Has pi got something to do with it or is it a burger? Divide by seven, add two because it’s Friday and take a wild guess. Oh, I don’t know – here are the maps.





Jogle Blogle – Day 33

Jogle Blogle – Day 33

Hello again everyone. Just to let you know that after the communication blackout of yesterday, contact has been re-established with the Jogler. Yes, my brother Steve, it can be confirmed, is still alive. And so we set off with him again on his journey from John O’Groats to Land’s End albeit two days behind now – after I’d worked so damn hard to catch up after the last little hiccup too! In case you’d lost count it’s Day 33, just past halfway and there is some serious walking to be done as he marches toward Snowdon the last of the three peaks to be conquered in this charity event for Macmillan Cancer Support. You can see why here –


He’s just about to leave Lancaster to resume his trek down south, but hold on – what’s this? He’s made a detour to the station to meet up with a mystery guest who’s going to accompany him today. Now I’ve been sworn to secrecy as to who this person is, but that makes no odds as the Jogler hasn’t actually told me who it is anyway, so we’ll just have to call the stranger, Jogler X.


They set off toward Preston along the canal, via Galgate marina and immediately got that sinking feeling. I think someone tied their mooring ropes too tight there.




I don’t know who the guy with the tripod was, and you can bet they never asked – come on, we need to know these things!


And that’s about all I can tell you, dear reader. Jogler X bought lunch (probably the only reason Steve asked him to come along).






Wildlife of the day had two entries, a paddling cow and some long necked Peruvian sheep.





Stats of the Day.

Blimey, no wonder he didn’t want to talk much – 29.1 miles    Total: 574.43

Steps were – 57,630    Total: 1,177,089

And it took 10 hours 33 minutes and 54 seconds

I’m going for a lie down after that, see you tomorrow.

By the way Steve, I’d be careful of the toilet – I worked on the sewage works up there!


Jogle Blogle – Interim Report

Jogle Blogle – Interim Report

And so it came to pass, dear Jogle Blogle reader, that for the first time during his walk from John O’Groats to Land’s End the Jogler has failed to submit his account of his journey during Day 33. Somewhat ironically it also happened to be the halfway point of Steve’s charity walk for Macmillan Cancer Support , but the message received here at Blogle HQ last night was,

‘I’m exhausted and only have the energy to sip gently at my Horlicks before I fall unconscious into bed. I may be some time.’

Rather reminiscent of Titus Oates and Scott’s fateful Antarctic mission, I thought.

Now at this point I dare say that I could make something up, a fabricated report of how the brave Jogler has strained every fibre of his being in an effort to get from Lancaster to Preston. But no! I know that you only expect the most honest of accounts and it behoves me to adhere to the most strict of disciplines.

Make something up!?


As if!

So we’ve got to wait I’m afraid until he can be arsed to get in touch again.

In the meantime, I was followed today on my Twitter account (other social media platforms are available) by @JogleMr who is about to start training for his own Jogle next year. He will be starting in April and cycling and wild camping the length of Britain.

Good luck with that sir.

He is currently seeking a worthwhile charity to support, so if you have any suggestions please contact him and let him know. If you don’t have a Twitter account then let me know here at Blogle HQ and I’ll forward your comments on.

I wonder if he wants a diarist for his adventure? I could turn professional. Blogler to the Joglers – or even Lejogs, it might be nice to go the other way for a change – stop sniggering at the back, I don’t know what you thought I was inferring!

I might get an award – The Queens Award for British Blogling. Liz and Phil would ask me round to their place for tea and cakes.

They might even make a film of the Blogle, Jason Mamoa would take my part obviously, we have a similar physique.

What’s that? ‘Who would play Steve?’ Hmm! Difficult that, now that Norman Wisdom is no longer with us.

But whatever, it’ll be huge. I wonder how much they pay for film rights these days? Perhaps I should get an agent. It could win an Emmy, or an Oscar, or a Brit award, or I could lie about my ethnicity and get a MOBO. They could make me president of the good ol’ US of A – they voted Reagan in after all.

Excuse me, I’ve got to go – acceptance speeches to write and all that.

If my brother gets in touch, tell him I may be some time.